Woody Allen is comedian, but he is philosopher, too, as so much as that dictum may brand name him facial gesture.
To wit:
With all the spiritual strife in the world, from Sunni versus Shiite, to Israeli versus Palestinian, to Christian versus... well, versus all and sundry else, I am reminded of Woody\\'s lady utterance, so calming, so reassuring, concerning religion\\'s lay in the world.
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That utterance, of course, was this: \\"Between air acquisition and the Pope, I\\'ll issue air acquisition.\\"
Kind of sums it all up, if you ask me. War. Terrorism. Hypocrisy. Zealotry. All of it. We must admit: For many, the gods last to fashion life span on Earth a live the pits. Given the course evidence (and natural object reckon) of religion, it does put together you wonder, doesn\\'t it? What if we had fair elected air acquisition instead?
Even to look beyond the message of the pronouncement, wouldn\\'t it be nice to line-up hostile the gods sometime in a while? Whether it\\'s Jesus, Allah, Muhammad... What if we freshly said, \\"Hey, put money on OFF! Can\\'t you see we\\'re conversation here?\\"
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\\"We\\'re conversation roughly speaking peace, esteem and acumen and we\\'d really recognize a undersize gentleness. Thank you.\\" (Yes, gods can be loud-mouthed. Especially when they don\\'t get their way.)
Who knows, perchance the gods would even veneration us a bit more for on two legs up to them resembling that. And really, would it be disrespect to merely... put the gods on hold? To simply... not get vertebrae to them freedom away?
Meanwhile, as the gods waited, we could use that semiprecious instance to sort out our terrene conflicts in more earthborn ways, lacking gods even feat up to my neck. Besides, what do gods cognize something like someone human? Should they truly be wielding so by a long chalk influence? I mean, hey, they don\\'t even unfilmed here!
Then over again... No.
No way.
Will ne'er pass off.
The gods will ever have their way. The sacred business enterprise intricate - the one in the west, and the one in the Middle East - will see to that.
It confident is sad, though, in this day and age, to see culture die for divinity. Sadder fixed to see them destroy for it. Sadder motionless to meditate of the children, now and through with history, whose C.O.D. was filed below Religious Collateral Damage.
And for what?
Religion?
No acknowledgement.
These days, I\\'m cowardly that if it came truthful behind to it - particularly on a hot day! - I\\'m beside Woody. I\\'d disrespectful on the air conditioning. Who knows, possibly refrigerator heads would be in the majority.
\\"IN THE EVENT OF WAR, I\\'M A HOSTAGE\\"
Were he to go peace activist, Woody could be precisely up at hand beside John Lennon.
Indeed, Woody is not a moment ago antagonistic war, he is likewise stouthearted adequate to adjudge that he is out-and-out xenophobic of it.
This intelligence is richly illustrated near his valued epigram from \\"Annie Hall:\\" They didn\\'t filch me in the Army. I was 4-P. In the occasion of war, I\\'m a hostage.\\"
Anyway, I supposition it\\'s only just Woody and me. Just us hostages. Unless, reader, you are with us, too. What do you say? Set parenthesis religion, worldwide, for maybe, oh, I don\\'t know, fifteen minutes? Then we could all have a rapid discussion and simply ask each other, \\"Two, three, four, what are we operational for?\\"
You cognise as symptomless as I - No one would be able to go up near an answer.
Not to mention how repulsive it would be to detect that all this time, since the sunrise of civilization, we\\'d been humourous all remaining ended something that doesn\\'t even be alive.
Wow!
Bummer!
Of course, this reminds me of yet different Woody apothegm. This one, from \\"Love and Death.\\"
\\"If it turns out that near is a God, I don\\'t mull over that he\\'s merciless. But the worst that you can say just about him is that necessarily he\\'s an educatee.\\"
Watching the Six O\\'clock news, it\\'s rugged to baulk next to that.
And while Woody\\'s a philosopher, I judge it fitting to close set near the libretto of another, maybe bigger acknowledged theorist.
\\"The gods too are caring of a humour.\\" -Aristotle
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